Life moves fast, and childhood even faster. My boys, full of laughter, curiosity, and light, are growing and changing with each passing day. They bring joy—pure, unfiltered joy. Their laughter fills the room, their kindness shines, their excitement for life is contagious. They are everything. And they deserve a parent who is fully present, ready to savor these fleeting moments.
It is easy to get lost in my trauma, grief, and pain because that is what trauma does. It has a hold on you, pulling you back into the past, keeping you stuck in what was lost instead of what is here. But I need to let go—so that I can hold on to my kids. They are right in front of me, full of life, love, and possibility. They deserve my presence, my laughter, my love, unfiltered by the weight of what came before.
My boys deserve a childhood where they feel safe, cherished, and free to explore the world with open hearts. And they deserve a parent who is not just watching, but laughing with them, playing with them, holding them close, and creating memories that will last a lifetime.
Peace may not have always been easy to find, but it is possible now. Not someday, not when everything is perfect, but today. Because time is not guaranteed, and these are the moments worth holding onto.
I know this is not going to be easy—trauma impacts every part of a person. But I am going to do it. I am going to do it for me, and I am going to do it for my boys.